Decoding Women's Personals Ads

IF HER PERSONALS AD SAYS ______...IT REALLY MEANS_____.
30-ish-------------------.39.
Adventurous--------------.Slept with everyone.
Athletic-----------------.No breasts.
Average looking----------.Moooo.
Beautiful----------------.Pathological liar.
Emotionally Secure-------.On medication.
Feminist-----------------.Fat.
Free Spirit--------------.Junkie.
Friendship first---------.Former Slut.
New-Age------------------.Body hair in the wrong places.
Old-fashioned------------.No B.J.’s.
Open-minded--------------.Desperate.
Outgoing-----------------.Loud and embarrassing.
Professional-------------.Bitch.
Voluptuous---------------.Very fat.
Large frame--------------.Hugely fat.
Wants soul mate----------.Stalker.

via