Friday, February 29, 2008
Iron Man Officially Looks Like It's Going to Kick Ass
I was completely against this movie when I saw the first trailer. And I totally hate the music they use in all of them. Pretty cliche. But this is impressive.
What the F*ck Is With Janet Jackson???
3 of the pictures below show Janet Jackson at a signing for her new CD "Discipline" at the Virgin Megastore in Hollywood yesterday. But I've secretly snuck in an unrelated picture. Can you guess which one is the fake? I don't wanna say which one yet because it will ruin the surprise.
The Smartest Guys In the World
This is how NOT to remove a big fucking tree from your yard.
How Not To Remove a Tree - Watch more free videos
How Not To Remove a Tree - Watch more free videos
FlipSticks Folding Chopsticks
Don't have enough space to carry your chopsticks around with you? You do now. Click pic.
BACON CUPS!!!
Probably the best usage of bacon EVER. I would eat any salad out of one of these bacon cups. Click pic to see how to make them.
Ridiculous: Man Charged With Murder After Cop Dies From Complications Arising From Shooting
Stupid: 40 years after the cop was shot. Double stupid: Man already served 20 years in prison for shooting the cop. Click pic for the story.
The Coolest F*cking Game You'll Play All Weekend: Cursor*10
It's a pretty simple concept. Once you get it it gets easier. Basically, click on the stairs. No stairs? Click a box. There's buttons on the floor that make stairs appear. When the time runs out, you start from the beginning, BUT, you play with the previous cursor. The goal: the 16th floor. Click pic to play.
Giant Song Chart Pool
A while back I posted some rap song charts. Now there's plenty more on Flickr. Go check 'em out, turkeys! Click pic.
Dear Innocent Random Man:
We're sorry we accidentally put your picture on the front page and called you a murderer. Here's a picture of the actual murderer. We apologize for any embarrassment or inconvenience that this may have caused. Click pic for the story.
The Worst Parents In the World
This is what happens when your kids THINKS he got an Xbox 360 for Xmas.
The Worst Parents In The World - Watch more free videos
The Worst Parents In The World - Watch more free videos
Ever Wonder How a Court Reporter's "Little Machine" Works?
Here's a (still confusing) explanation. Click pic.
Thursday, February 28, 2008
"The Monster" Has Been Found
An immense, fossilized "sea monster" found by scientists in the Arctic is the largest marine reptile ever discovered. Click pic.
The Gruesome Origins of 5 Popular Fairy Tales
Did you know: Snow White's step-mother had unusal eating habits? Instead of proof of Snow's death by bbeing shown her heart, she actually wanted to eat it. Along with her liver, lungs, intestines and pretty much every other major internal organ? Or that the Prince that found Sleeping Beauty actually thought she was so beautiful he had his way with her right then and there? Yeah, while she was comatose. Click pic for more.
The 10 Worst Products For Men Ever Created
Yeah, you know you want to know what the hell this is. Click pic to find out.
Awkward Japanese Robot Can Jump Up From Flat On Its Back. Doesn't Do Much Else.
This awkward robot from Japan showcases the huge leaps forward we've made in robot technology. They can jump up into a squat from lying flat on their backs now! The next huge leap forward: standing up!
Britney Still a Stupid/Crazy Bitch
According to Gatecrasher: "She flummoxed staff at the Betsey Johnson on Melrose Ave. this month by turning up with a Dolce & Gabbana dress she wanted the store to copy - in all white - to be ready by that evening. According to a witness, "the staff explained that they didn't have a dressmaker on call who could do it in time." Never mind that the frock she wanted copied wasn't even their label. "The only thing she wanted to buy in the store was the yellow wig on a mannequin in the window," laughs the source. "The manager eventually agreed to offer it to her for $100."
The manager fucked up. She should have said the wig cost 10 hundred. Or said "it cost this much", then show her a drawing of a duck. Britney has no idea what the hell is going on in the world so she would have just nodded and handed over a black AmEx. Then the manager could hit 9 and then 0's until the keypad broke. And if Britney’s accountant ever questioned it, Britney would say, "I was lead to believe it was on sale for duck. I thought that meant free. I wuz under the impression ducks were free."
Click pic for the article.
Man Bursts Into College Classroom With a Gun and Threatens To Execute People
Funny: It was just a preparedness drill sponsored by the university.
Not Funny: They didn't bother to tell anyone it was just a drill. Click pic.
Not Funny: They didn't bother to tell anyone it was just a drill. Click pic.
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Suck It, Scientology!
A web forum dedicated to distributing information about Scientology has uncovered an out-of-print German book written by Dr. Anastasius Nordenholz, originally published in 1934, called "Scientologie". Those who have read it claim it bears a stunning resemblance to works written by Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard thirty years later.
"Nordenholz calls for a "science of knowledge" thusly, creating the term 'Scientology'. "The task of Scientology is the erection of the systems of knowledge, of understanding, of comprehension per se. Knowledge is the common material of all other sciences. It follows therefore that the science of knowledge itself is the key-science of the overall system of the sciences of the world. All other sciences of the world have the science of knowledge as their presuppositions..."
It does sound like the same kind of stuff L. Ron wrote. Except he jazzed it all up with alien wars and spaceships. It makes it more exciting. Similarly, I took a copy of the Wall Street Journal and drew a dinosaur on it and then started my own non-fakey Hollywood religion. I call it Dinonomics. Click pic above to see more of the book.
"Nordenholz calls for a "science of knowledge" thusly, creating the term 'Scientology'. "The task of Scientology is the erection of the systems of knowledge, of understanding, of comprehension per se. Knowledge is the common material of all other sciences. It follows therefore that the science of knowledge itself is the key-science of the overall system of the sciences of the world. All other sciences of the world have the science of knowledge as their presuppositions..."
It does sound like the same kind of stuff L. Ron wrote. Except he jazzed it all up with alien wars and spaceships. It makes it more exciting. Similarly, I took a copy of the Wall Street Journal and drew a dinosaur on it and then started my own non-fakey Hollywood religion. I call it Dinonomics. Click pic above to see more of the book.
Where the Wild Things Are...2009?
Rumors abound about the status of Where the Wild Things Are, the Spike Jonze directed, Jonze and Dave Eggers-written adaptation of Maurice Sendak’s classic children’s book. The film was near complete but the studio was upset and thinking about re-shooting the entire thing. There were conflicting rumors about whether Jonze would be doing the re-shoots and how extensive they'd be. As of today, Jonze is still the director, but the new release date according to the studio is October 2009. I’m thinking 20 months is just enough time to call up Tim Allen and reshoot it as a Christmas movie. Will a regular schlub be able to save the holidays? Oh my God I can’t wait to find out! Click pic for the story.
ANOTHER Bourne Identity???
There were only three books, and director Paul Greengrass and star Matt Damon both promised there would only be three movies. Damon even said jokingly that a fourth would have to be called The Bourne Redundancy. But then a producer said, “Here’s ten million dollars, now bark like dog, bitch!” and so he did. Click pic.
Papercut Art is F*cking Amazing
Peter Callesen is an artist who cuts up paper into beautiful little things. Sort of like Papercraft, but he always uses the actual sheet from which the design was cut as part of the piece. They're all absolutely beautiful. I really admire the time and patience this takes. I know, because I've tried to make Papercraft objects before and I sliced off a finger and glued my hand to my privates. Click pic for his website.
What a Moron
Doing a backflip ANYWHERE with very little clothing is just stupid. Doing it on wet concrete...even worse.
Crave Online: Funny Videos, Sexy Videos, Music Videos, Movie Trailers, and More!
Crave Online: Funny Videos, Sexy Videos, Music Videos, Movie Trailers, and More!
Jay Leno Says, "Suck It!"
Leno doesn't plan on retiring from TV. Networks are trying to scoop him up. Conan will still replace him. Who replaces Conan? Unfortunately, it might be Jimmy Fallon. Click pic for story.
The Best Episode of Space Ghost. Ever. No, Seriously.
I'm don't like Space Ghost...but I loved this. In this episode, Space Ghost gets bit by an ant and follows it home.
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
It's Amazing How the Garfield Comic Strip is Better Without Garfield
Seriously. I've never laughed at a Garfield comic strip. And I literally laughed out loud. Click pic for more.
BEST PROMOTION EVER!
The Signal is a horror-comedy about a mysterious transmission that turns everyone who sees it into killers. This is only noteworthy because two people got stabbed at a recent screening.
Just before people started running out in a panic, two men sitting in separate areas of the [Fullerton, CA] theater were randomly stabbed by an unknown man, [Police] said. "He started stabbing at the theater seat and then he stabbed the victim," Basham said. "As he fled, he stabbed another victim sitting near the exit."
Holy crap. Best promotion ever?
"One man suffered a stab wound to the arm, which punctured into his chest and was taken to UCI Medical Center in Orange. The other man was also stabbed in the arm and taken to St. Jude Medical Center. Both are expected to survive. The attacker, who is believed to have been kicked out of the theater earlier, escaped."
Yes, Fullerton theaters are infamous for their draconian "No Stabbing People" policies. Well Signal marketing department, color me impressed. I hope this trend continues and everyone that watches The Happening will kill themselves.
Just before people started running out in a panic, two men sitting in separate areas of the [Fullerton, CA] theater were randomly stabbed by an unknown man, [Police] said. "He started stabbing at the theater seat and then he stabbed the victim," Basham said. "As he fled, he stabbed another victim sitting near the exit."
Holy crap. Best promotion ever?
"One man suffered a stab wound to the arm, which punctured into his chest and was taken to UCI Medical Center in Orange. The other man was also stabbed in the arm and taken to St. Jude Medical Center. Both are expected to survive. The attacker, who is believed to have been kicked out of the theater earlier, escaped."
Yes, Fullerton theaters are infamous for their draconian "No Stabbing People" policies. Well Signal marketing department, color me impressed. I hope this trend continues and everyone that watches The Happening will kill themselves.
Starbucks to Close Every Store In the Country Today For Three Hours
Why? To train uninterested baristas. America horrified by the fact they will have to make their own coffee for three hours –- with no training at all. Click pic.
Pet Peek Makes Your Dog An Astronaut, Sad
Pet Peeks are torture devices for dogs that make them look like space cadets. They consist of an acrylic plastic bubble you install in the fence so your pet can see out. They cost $30 apiece and make me sad. I'm not really convinced that a Pet Peek is better than your dog just not knowing what's happening on the other side. I mean, why not just a hole? Ah yes, dogs can't wipe their snot on a hole. Nor can you sell them (except in donut form).
Atari 2600 Cake Is Vintage And Delicious
Made by Cakes By the Pound in Los Angeles, this thing looks like beautiful retro deliciousness. And for all of you out there that think you're above eating a cake made to look like a 30-year old gaming console, I've got some news for you -- this cake looks delicious. I don't care if it falls on the floor and your dog picks it up, it's worth prying those jaws open and getting back. Click pic for more.
NOTE: I have never eaten a piece of cake after it's been on the floor and a dog has picked it up. That is fucking gross. An ex-girlfriend did though. She's nasty and loves cake more than I do.
NOTE: I have never eaten a piece of cake after it's been on the floor and a dog has picked it up. That is fucking gross. An ex-girlfriend did though. She's nasty and loves cake more than I do.
Remembering Achtung Baby
I was in the shower today and started thinking about Achtung Baby, which I would say was U2's last great album. A lot of their singles weren't huge except for "One" and "Mysterious ways," but here's a couple other goodies off that album.
"The Fly"
"Even Better Than the Real Thing" - This video I really liked only 'cause of that awesome revolving camera shit they used. I never got how they exactly did that going in between legs and stuff. Then again, I never really gave it too much thought.
"Zoo Station" - Their tour for this album was centered around TV, where the message was "watch more TV." I'm guessing they were trying to tell you to learn and explore the world and universe through tv much like I feel should be done with the internet. So they're bombard you with tv images from their "ZOO TV" station on HUGE tvs and then they'd start rocking out. This video is not from that tour. I believe this is actually from the Vertigo tour.
"The Fly"
"Even Better Than the Real Thing" - This video I really liked only 'cause of that awesome revolving camera shit they used. I never got how they exactly did that going in between legs and stuff. Then again, I never really gave it too much thought.
"Zoo Station" - Their tour for this album was centered around TV, where the message was "watch more TV." I'm guessing they were trying to tell you to learn and explore the world and universe through tv much like I feel should be done with the internet. So they're bombard you with tv images from their "ZOO TV" station on HUGE tvs and then they'd start rocking out. This video is not from that tour. I believe this is actually from the Vertigo tour.
Prozac, Used by 40 Million People, Does Not Work Say Scientists
What's you're excuse now??? Click pic.
Oasis' Noel Gallagher is Moving. Why?
Because he can't stand living in his holiday home knowing his neighbor James Bunt is nearby making terrible music. Suck it, "Beautiful." Click pic for the story.
Where In the World is Osama Bin Laden?
In documentary attention-whore Morgan Spurlock's new film, he doesn't eat McDonalds, but he DOES try finding Bin Laden. Click pic for trailer.
What a Beautiful Ice Sculpture!
And it's almost finished! I hope it doesn't come crashing to the ground before it's done. Oh wait. This is Nothing For X.
http://view.break.com/459447 - Watch more free videos
http://view.break.com/459447 - Watch more free videos
Monday, February 25, 2008
Everybody's Free
"Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen) by Baz Luhrmann
A great song with an equally great video. I recommend that everybody watches this. This song has been a favorite of mine since it was released in 1999.
A great song with an equally great video. I recommend that everybody watches this. This song has been a favorite of mine since it was released in 1999.
The Racist Test
If Ricky Gervais wants to give you the Racist Test, you might as well let him. Click pic.
Friday, February 22, 2008
David Horvitz Will Do Things For You For Money
This is a bit "who-the-fuck-would-pay-for-this?" but apparently people have. I'd like to give him money to do something. Here's an example:
"If you give me any amount of money I will cash it, put it in my pocket, grab my camera, and walk out my front door not knowing what I will do. I will then travel somewhere for as cheap as possible. I will keep just enough money so that I can get back. I will send you all the receipts and documentation of this. This is for any amount. If you give me $1 maybe I will walk out my door and buy a chocolate bar and then come home. If you give me $123 maybe I will get on a greyhound bus headed for who knows where. I will go somewhere."
Click pic above to see lots more.
"If you give me any amount of money I will cash it, put it in my pocket, grab my camera, and walk out my front door not knowing what I will do. I will then travel somewhere for as cheap as possible. I will keep just enough money so that I can get back. I will send you all the receipts and documentation of this. This is for any amount. If you give me $1 maybe I will walk out my door and buy a chocolate bar and then come home. If you give me $123 maybe I will get on a greyhound bus headed for who knows where. I will go somewhere."
Click pic above to see lots more.
Your Yodeling Rocks My F*cking Socks
Yodeling? Check. Ugly-face-making band leader? Check. High pitched whistling? Check. Disregard for tempo? Double check. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you "Hocus Pocus" by Focus.
How to Shave Without Getting Razor Bumps
Not a lot of people need this but you'll still be surprised. Click pic.
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